If he saw me hurt that way...

1. My friends.
2. My family.
3. My house.
4. When its cold ooutside and your inside warm.
5. Movie nights.
6. Coffee.
7. Deep conversations.
8. Butterflies when you see someone.
9. That feelng when your onstage.
10. Peanut butter and nuttella pancakes.
11. When we win.
12. Feeling higher than everything.
13. Parties.
14. Meeting pretty people.
15. Nice clothes.
16. Knit wear.
17. Doubl music on a wednesday.
18. Ialia conti.
19. Finishing something.
20. Laughing.
21. Summer.
22. Hyde park.
23. Starbucks.
24. Music.
25. Blonde hair.
26. High shoes.
27. Stars.
28. Lyrics
29. Getting on with someone you just met.
30. Emotion.
31. La roux.
32. Security.
33. Love.
34. Hate.
35. France.
36. NYC.
37. My dreams.
38. Fridays.
39. Wake up texts.
40. Late night conversations.
41. Feeling pretty.
42. Pictures.
43. Happiness.
44. Seeing people smile.
45. Sorting out peoples lives.
46. Late night car journeys.
47. Hotel rooms.
48. Christmas.
49. My birthday.
50. Getting a text from the person iwant.
51. The blue smartie.
52. Ben and Jerrys.
53. Kayleighs house.
54. Fear.
55. Thorpe park.
56. Welsh accents.
57. American accents.
58. English.
59. Creative writing.
60. Maths class.
61. My girls.
62. When a dress fits you.
63. Getting call backs.
64. Facebook photolikes and comments.
65. The like button.
66. Winter mornings.
67. Partys in the dark.
68. Scary movies.
69. Boys with pretty faces.
70. Pixie Lott.
71. Pretty Underwear.
72. When I paint my nails good.
73. Being drunk.
74. After party sleep.
75. Shows, and how everyone gets on.
76. Tai Chi night (L).
77. Funny people.
78. How blonde I go after my hair has just been bleached.
79. Cheneys mums skills with scissors.
80. Amazing weekends.
81. Picnics.
82. My diary.
83. Presents.
84. Surprises.
85. Nice hair.
86. Boys who smell nice.
87. Fierce cologne.
88. Flat caps.
89. Nick and Noras infinite playlist.
90. 27 Dresses.
91. High tops.
92. Ice cream.
93. Strawberries.
94. Gum
95. Mac cosmetics.
96. Abercrombie.
97. Looking individual.
98. Writing pretty songs.
99. Nights that you wished would last forever.
100. When my heart beats fast.

♥

Last night was amazing
Im to tired to go into detail,
but basically

Thats becutiful.

Every time you leave with her, Something inside of me dies...

so la roux was amazing :)
had such a great night
becca, i love you :)

i wish my phone was fixed, it makes it hard to text you when its not :)

im pretty happy at this second :)
and friends is about to come on ahhhh how i love this show :)
so i love my girls
and a few others...
:)
it's all good baby :)
ciaras tomorrow :)
cant wait
i love everyone :)

when i see you walking with her i have to cover my eyes...

waiting for la roux with becca,
shes taking long :)
and becca just paid 1 fucking 85 for a drink :)
shes pissed
it was watered down
quote: 'do you want ice?'
'no i don't fucking want ice!'
i love you :)
im happy
everything is good :)

It wont ever be the same again,
i just know it
and this time, i mean it

Blogging is becoming an obsession...

Im getting the vibe i am not good enough,
and then reality smacks me round the face.

And its these few moments i really, really breakdown.

What if i dont make it
I just have to
I cant stay here anymore

And im being told, your too young

But maybe thats a soft way of saying, your not good enough

I know im not,
i have to train harder
work better
focus more.

This just has to happen

I cant be 22
I want to be 19 when i finish
then i want to go to America
To the big NYC
and i wanna have a career
And every night
i want to just dance, and everyday
I want to train

And then when the time comes, and im to old to dance

I want to give others the opportunity's i didnt have,
Im going to open a school ,
Its going to be a theater school
Filled with dusty wooden floors and ballet bars and battered mirrors,
and it will be made of red bricks

And im going to take the students with potential, and passion
and it will be state funded, not filled with rich kids.

I think my dreams are to big for me...

Keep this kingdom free of hassle...

Im gunna start looking for the good.
Everything will be better :)

Cheney;

They say that when you love someone you have to let them go...

The truth is i love you more than the world beneath my feet,
Letting you go will be next to impossible,
But i know that you will be happy,
and so for your happiness, i will be happy.
I will look past the distance
and i will see you still living a bus ride away from me.

You are not alone, ever
I am with you always :)

I hope that bath is everything you wish for it to be,
and youll write the most beautiful songs,
and when your famous ill play your songs and remember the times in the hall during double music.

And even if by some small chance we drift apart i know i will always have my twinny (L)

Youve changed me and inspired me.
You looked after me when i drunk too much and got sick, and you tried to stop me saying all those stupid things i said.
You were there when i was going though shit and you picked me back up, like you always do.

Your a part of me.

You are not a sinking ship,
merely a Phoenix rising from the ashes of ruislip
ready to take on what is thrown at you.

''It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a hand print on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend... ''

Cheney i love you,
x

yeahhhhhh...

So, im just having a bad weekend,
Reading that was just wonderfull.
Why thank you :|.

i need to start sleeping more.

Your not a man, Your just a mannequin...

I hate you.
I hate you so much
like just get the fuck out of my life.


I wannna get into college so bad i think im gunna scream, If i dont get in ill just die
Like everything will be crap

Im not religious,
But im preying for this.

Your a regular decorated emergency...

ooooh,
im so scaredd :(

She like em' tougher than leather...

Its a friday night and im at home
I have no life,
Kayleigh is off at Jobros
and Miss parsons is seeing New moon,
Lucky whores, i want to do both :)
But cheney said shell see new moon again so im gunna drag everyone, so i can see the guy who plays jake (L)
I havent been on the computer for a while so my hands arent working with this keyboard


I dont really have anything left to say.

well, aren't you a delightful little love struck teen
don't worry
it wont last :)
sorry to burst your safe, warm little bubble

forever, forever...

I swear to god
If someone rolls into prom in a sherri hill i will react in one of two ways,
1. I could react by smacking them and them throwing soup over there beloved garment.
Or...
2. I could shoot myself im the face.
People heard me talking about it today and looked it up in class
FFS
Go find your own ideas
stop taking mine.
I swear i have nothing of my own anymore
it shall be the day when people say,
oh my gawd
or
gaaaad
When i know im not myself.
eugh
rant over.

Dear lord, I don't have an eating disorder.

Nodding my head like yeahh, moving my hips like yeahh...

Its all good,
:)
Im happy
Ive drunk so much coffee :)

I have beautiful friends (:
And my life is good at this moment in time,
What more can want :)

Ill be your number one with the bullet...

So this is awkward.
and slow
and silent.

And im guessing you know whats happened,
But you dont have any spine, so you wont admit it,

So im a barbie?
with no friends,
and im stuck up
and you just hate me.
We put on fake smiles to pretend to get on?
Shut up twat.
We dont get along
And i dont pretend to like you.
And for future reference..
No i will not tell you about my personal life. why? because you will tell your skatty friends.
And yes sweetie,
they do care about what goes on in my life.

Take me back to last friday night?
It was good.
Alot better than yestarday.

Dance, this is the way they love...

Had a lovely meal tonight
I love Becca.

I love my girls.

Right now, i feel like Ive been hit by a bus, and like it reversed over me, twice.

Untitled...

Cheney opens my eyes,


I am bored, of sneaky
conniving
manipulative
little bitches.

Because there everywhere, truthfully, i want out,
Of this school,
This place,
This town.

I will be happy when im in a different place.

Because people are idiots,
too consumed within themselves, Open up your eyes and see other people for once in your self absorbed lives.

Just, let it be.

A caffeine kick to get her started...

You make my head go crazy :)

Today was lovely...
I sat in starbucks on regents street, with the beautiful miss Fisher
Enjoying a gingerbread Lattee :)
was gorgeous.

Im now feeling pretty blank,
and i want you to text me.

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone (8)

Wow.
your a giant retard.
You've really out gayed yourself.

Cant wait to be out of this shit town.

Im talking about erry'body getting crunk, boys trynaa to touch my junk...

I dont think im taken seriously,
and i think people think im stupid :/
I know its my fault, i mean
im not smart anymore,
education has failed me disastrously
and only the power of being able to write has stayed :)

i have a feeling that if i get into college im going to flunk out at school
because hey? im in right.
I dont need to worry anymore.
And because of the stupid way my lazy mind works i feel like an idiot.
But its just how i function,
and i cant help that :/
I know i need to get myself into gear and start trying, but its the people who tell me i need to work, such as mamma abbott, that makes me want to not work more.
I think well, if you want me to do it so much, then i wont.
So its best to accept my laziness
and let me fuck my life up.
Because i know everything is gunna work out in the end.

God i wish i wasnt such a dumb shit.
Oh well ill always have my dance and literature to see me through.

This venting didnt help me.

Its the end of the summer, Its the end of it all...

So, mixed feelings are always managing to leave me speechless.
Finding something out like that should make me feel like i just got hit by a bus,
Because im sure the other person is feeling the exact same.
But i didnt
it was maybe more of a poke.
Because i dont care.
ooops sorry.

And then theres YOU
:)
oh dear.
just oh dear.


Ive realised im so indecisive.
Like my mind changes over night
so im scared to say what i should in case i wake up tomorrow and regret it.
And i dont wanna mess with your head.
So ill keep quiet.

I want movie night NOW.
i had my English exam today
IT WAS SO HACKIN LONG

-i just typed that word 7 times before it didn't have a typo :P

yeah injection tomorrow.
I think im gunna be sick
Then ANOTHER GCSE on Thursday.
Ahh dear lord :)
Bring on the weekend though eh?
I think things should get better from here :/
Maybe?

I have stuff in my mind that i cant write anywhere :/
Not in my diary and not on here. My words aren't safe anywhere.
So i need to like find some release somehow. :)

I get random surges of complete happiness.
And i love those feelings.
For about 7 seconds ill feel weightless, like nothing can get me. Or bring me down.
No one can touch me up there.
And then i come back down
and its like ouch.
So i just wait for those moments i want to freeze with my Bernard's Watch :)

I ramble :P
And im sure reading this is boring but if it is SCREW YOU :)

I love you chicks...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
blah
Ima tell you one time

Ima keep waiting, waiting for the world to change

Oh god, oh god shes really done it now...

ENGLISH EXAM
time for sleep :|

Cheney,
I love you.
Like so much.
And i know your going to be there my WHOLE life, like youll be at my wedding,
and at my funeral ;)
but you wont cry becuase youll know i want you to party :)
But im scared,
im scared to loose you when you move away
im scared that youll find somone better,
more fun,
more blonde?
I know im being stupid
But you mean too much for me to lose you now
I need you here in my life
Or my funeral will come quicker than people will expect :)
I just needed to let you know,
that im scared.
So facebook? Thats whats on my mind.
Cheney i know that we'll always have a connection, no matter where we are.
Because your my light ♥

Haven't blogged in what seems like eternity :)
so everything has gotten amazing
spak is a tard
and we won
agggggggghhhhhhhh i feel so happy right now :)
Friday night was immense, although im toatally shit at xbox games, and Nintendo games
i beat Harley once and i will NEVER FORGET IT.
So everything is good again
no ranting for me today :)
and im off into town later
just PREYING IT DOESN'T RAIN.
ahhh pointe dance in the show,
i felt It yesterday
jeeeze my feet were like,
i dunno in alot of pain :) but it was good so i dont care :)
Fireworks night was well good, i admit it was cold
but i never dress warmly anyway,
as long as we look fiarce hey girlies ;)
but any way it was good and the walk along the manor after was funny :)
UNTIL we got harassed by drunks,
this was after all the boys had left and it was dark :)
but we didnt care,
the night was good
ENGLISH EXAM TOMMORORORWOWWW
eww :)

anyway im gunna bop because im not blogging anything good right now and i just sound like a spaktard:)

Love you muffins ♥

Ive been watching while you sleep...

BABY.

Hmm you read something, and you wonder if its about you?
But if your wrong you look liek an arse?
so you just dont ask

We all work the same darlings,
:)
its wonderfull

Im talking bull :)

and DEAR LORD we won
full on :D
ahh beat you like a pinyata :)

You are my band aid...

Everything should
STOP
and stay still
just for a little while
now THAT would be lovely (L)

Success is a lot to different people. One person may find success is being promoted in there job, or another person may find that success is merely completing a simple task. I suppose it depends on ones opinion or quality of life on how large a scale of success can be. In my opinion success would be simply being able to dance and perform in front of an audience, large or small. And being able to reach the thrill of adrenalin of a show everyday for the rest of my life. But another may think that success is to become everything they have ever wanted to be.

It has been said ‘We were born to succeed, not to fail.’ If this is true, each of us is born with a desire. And a task to completer within our lives. A certain feeling of success will be achieved when this simple or difficult task has been completed, and we have not failed.

People believe that we are behind our own success and only we can change the future ahead of us, but I believe that the people who surround us can help to determine what happens in our life and the e level of success a person can achieve. For example, if a person is surrounded by positive people they will strive to achieve more success than if they are surrounded by negative people.

To succeed, a person must be happy, if the task they are attempting is not one which they enjoy then it will be much harder to achieve the goal ahead of them.

Its so clear now...

I think you should know,
You mean more to me than every single fucking star in this sky.
I would let my dreams fail so that yours could strive.
I cant put into words all the thanks for the late night texts,
You are the one i fall upon when i brake
and you have an incredible strength within you that i totally admire
You are my saving grace Cheney.
I love you.
I depend on you.
You are my shining light.
Full stopped, forever.
Love, i am always here for you,
even though you don't trip up half as much as i do,
on the rare occasion that you fall
i will catch you.
I will never, ever let you hit the ground.

Ill keep you up there.

I am changing,

Trying everyway i can

I am changing,

Ill be better than i am.

Ha well done
you hurt me worse than last time
round of applause for you.

Crush Crush Crush...

You told me you were over me.
So why are you still doing this.
FUCKING HELL

EVERYTHING IS WRONG.