I feel so incredibly alone right now,
Its funny how when certain people are asleep you feel totally lost.
So currently I feel lost. Lost and tired and awake and anxious and angry.
But mostly I just miss you :/ more that you know I think. I miss you and I'm lonely amd eugh.
Shut up flik.
Your wearing yourself out.

Imaginary, you're fucking imaginary. The things you say don't mean shit, never did. So I'm cutting you out. Anyway, that's what you wanted wasn't it? I'm gunna taunt you and cut you down and make you remember


Its christmas soon :)

im a fucking joke

You want to know what this feels like?
It feels like you just told your deepest, darkest secret to your best friend to find that she runs on stage and shouts it out to the whole world. From then on everywhere you turn, no one quiet knows how to react. Your exposed. Your skins been peeled from your muscles, your bones, Your ribs are cracked and your hearts dangerously close to stopping. It feels like everyone who looks into your eyes sees straight into your mind. Straight into your soul and sees everything you need, desire, the things you do when your sat alone, the times you've though that perhaps there are people watching, cameras, anything. It feels like all the hurt has just been bottled up at sea, and you found it washed up upon your tiny, deserted island; and not knowing what to do, you opened it. And in that tiny moment your world crashes down around you. All the walls you've buit up to protect yourself. They didnt mean anything, they cant protect you from this.
It's that split second when you leave your house and you think your naked, the moment your foot slips on the staires and lightning shocks through your body and into your toes, the time when your young and you turn around to find that mums not there in the busy street. Your raw and open and empty. Alone.
Its shit.

Tears dont mean you're losing, everybodys bruising.

Looking back now and theres so much i wish i could change if i could. Reget is the worst feeling ever. Becuase you just think what if. What if i protected you better, maybe if i stayed up late with yuo and sheltered you and stopped you, maybe we'd be in a different place. But i didnt, so i cant change that.
I wish i had the courage to say all these things i want to. The im sorrys, the I love you's the thank yous. Becuase i think what if i died tomorrow, like, would you cry? or would you just think ' oh were not that close anyway'
i know ive changed, but i had to. like now im happy, i am finally myself, and im making less and less mistakes, Becuase im a big girl now. Recently ive learnt how to deal with alot. And im trying to fix things, i really am. I just have these temptattions that are had to push aside. But i do coz im stronger now than i was then, so i have a shout. write it in my diary. Have a cry. Breathe and move on. What else can i do.
Ive lost alot, and believe me i know what ive lost.
shit happens though right?
not to everyone.

Dont lose it all in the blur of the start.
Seeing is decieving, dreaming is believeing,
Its okay not to be okay,

Its okay not to be okay.

Nonononono.
Eugh.
So this is how it is.
I've slowly taught myself how to not feel this, and to not miss people. Ive learnt how to not have sympathy and to hate self pity.
But it just got so hard. And about 5 minuets ago everything hit. Everything.
Last night I was so scared.

I'm so sorry, soso sorry. I didnt want to make you feel like that I just get so tired.

Not long.

None of you have a fucking clue.
Everythings shit.

I love my boyfriend
I love becca, she's incredible. You don't get loyalty like hers. You never had anything on her. Shes fucking amazing.

Flik. Sort your fucking life out.

I missed my bestfriend.
So fucking much.

This world,
the one we live in
yeah. its fucked,

I would delete your fucking number if i didnt need you so bad sometimes.

Fucks sake.

Ps, my boyfriend, is. amazing.
Ive sorted stuff out with my twin♥

Ive made the bast friends.
shits looking up

probably more than everr,
weve all changed so much though,


and how the fuuuck could i forget it man,,
do it righttt now, that song was like my lifeee mann

thatss so amazing,
♥

its cool y'no, i miss the old times too,
i think we all doo,

maybe we all just got a bit mixed up, and maybe we grew up a bit too fast,
probably one of the weirdest situations ive been in


come and run with me, i dont wanna lose you in the light, take my hand,
its a start its a new begining baby

i didnt forget ♥

♥


i agree,



i FUCKING love colleege

bring me sunday
today was a joke
the show was shit
i feel sick

yh

Don't go thinking my life is shit or anything
My lifes sick, I've met some amazing people at college and I finally feel like I can be myself around them, it's like I've spent the last 5 years being someone I'm not. But it don't matter now because I'm myself :) and I have the best friend ever and she's amazing and keeps me going always
Despite this everything is going to get hard, and there's gunna be times where I don't leave my house, and I don't go to collegeand I might turn up on you're doorstep in hysterics, but your gunna have to put up with me.
I might just be okay.

Interview today, hope it goes good.

You make me want to punch a hole, into my face, you inconsiderate, dirty, arrogant whore.

How do you do that shit
Fuck you man.

People talk so much bull, all the time. You can suck my dick. lol

Its only going to get harder from now on.
I feel so drained at the moment, like its an effort to even smile, its just one of those weeks right? wrong.
This pain is really, fully shit and totally real.
Im making up for all the times i let you down, that i wasnt there, that you thought i didnt care.
You say its all going to be okay, we both know its not. But neither of us will admit it.

I love you so much.
Im sorry.

You dont even have a clue, all you have to worry about is school work and what your gunna wear tommorow,
So stop fucking complaining,
this was all for the best
fucking cunt.

:'(

I had a re think.

1. My friends.
2. My family.
3. My house.
4. When its cold ooutside and your inside warm.
5. Nights watching Movies.
6. Coffee.
7. Deep conversations.
8. Butterflies when you see someone.
9. That feelng when your onstage.
10. Peanut butter and nuttella pancakes.
11. Becca and Georgia.
12. Feeling higher than everything.
13. Parties.
14. Meeting pretty people.
15. Sam.
16. Knit wear.
17. Memories.
18. Ialia conti.
19. Finishing something.
20. Laughing.
21. Summer.
22. Hyde park.
23. Starbucks.
24. Music.
25. Blonde hair.
26. High shoes.
27. Stars.
28. Lyrics
29. Getting on with someone you just met.
30. Emotion.
31. La roux.
32. Security.
33. Love.
34. Hate.
35. France.
36. NYC.
37. My dreams.
38. Fridays.
39. Wake up texts.
40. Late night conversations.
41. Feeling pretty.
42. Pictures.
43. Happiness.
44. Seeing people smile.
45. Things working out.
46. Late night car journeys.
47. Hotel rooms.
48. Christmas.
49. My birthday.
50. Getting a text from the person i want.
51. The blue smartie.
52. Ben and Jerrys.
53. Thigh High Socks.
54. Fear.
55. Thorpe park.
56. Welsh accents.
57. American accents.
58. English.
59. Creative writing.
60. Amersham and wycombe college.
61. The friends ive got left.
62. When a dress fits you.
63. Getting call backs.
64. Facebook photolikes and comments.
65. The like button.
66. Winter mornings.
67. Partys in the dark.
68. Scary movies.
69. Boys with pretty faces.
70. Pixie Lott.
71. Pretty Underwear.
72. When I paint my nails good.
73. Being drunk.
74. After party sleep.
75. Shows, and how everyone gets on.
76. Tai Chi night (L).
77. Funny people.
78. How blonde I go after my hair has just been bleached.
79. Cheneys mums skills with scissors.
80. Amazing weekends.
81. Picnics.
82. My diary.
83. Presents.
84. Surprises.
85. Nice hair.
86. Boys who smell nice.
87. Fierce cologne.
88. Flat caps.
89. Kisses under the covers.
90. 27 Dresses.
91. High tops.
92. Ice cream.
93. Strawberries.
94. The feeling you give me.
95. Mac cosmetics.
96. Abercrombie.
97. Looking individual.
98. Writing pretty songs.
99. Nights that you wished would last forever.
100. When my heart beats fast.

i dont think ive ever been so afraid in my whole life.
ever.

oh fuck

i cant even describe this,
dear god let this be okay



ometimes i wish we could just pretend even if only for one weekend, so comeone, tell me, is this the end.

I just cry
all the time
and i have every reason to!
so please stop asking if im okay, becuase no im not

And you, you dont fucking care.

i hate everything right now
im angry and sad and frustrated and so fucking depressed all the fucking time
i have to write a speach

i just want to get swallowed up by the world
im such a failiur.

i just want to cry,
but my eyelashes would fall off.

FUCK EVERYTHING.

we touch i feel a rush.

Don't play games it'll be dangerous if you fuck me over
Cause if I get burnt, I'ma show ya what it's like to hurt
Cause I've been treated like dirt befo' ya

Would it be tooo much for me to ask for you not to see her anymore
Fucks sake.
No I'm not okay with it. Sorry for the inconvenience


Dick.

Today was so nice, Im not even gunna bother trying to fill this up with shitty big words that make me sound obnoxious, seeing cheney was totally lovely and i missed her more than i noticed, she brings out a good side of me and i like it. We spoke about almost everything.
Then i made a cheesecake at beccas, that was fun even though im not much of a cook.

Feels strange not seeing you tonight?
i dont like it...
Im so tired though, lke my eyes are half shut right now aha,

ew. urdang monday,

Last night, I can't even bEgin to explain.

Generally feeling angry today,
written some longg entries into what i dont want to call my diaery but theres not much else to call it so. Diary.
People frustrate me so much
You? your a little cunt arent you, getting all defensice over whats practically nothing!
I cba with these peoples dramas anymore.
Amershams made me nicer.

shit happens`

but you let it,
i did try
you fucked off


its cool though.

you always wanted to be her;

My life is c lose enough to perfect, My boyfriend is lovely and hes gorgeous and he takes care of me, my new college is actually amazing, im being worked like a bitch, Its great.
Becca sutherland is stunning.

Guess its safe to say everythings not the same
summer changed everything
shook my whole little world upside down.

Shit, isnt it.
When all you know is proven wrong?

FUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOUFUCK YOU
FUCKK YOU.

Where are you now?

Sometimes, i miss you,
just becuase i can.
Its good when you miss people, coz when you see them again, it makes it so much better.

Like before i went away,
the night before i left, and you just held me so tight.
and the day i got back,
we just lay there.
In perfect silence.

I miss the summer. I miss laying under the stars with you, freezing- you kept me so warm. I miss being out late and having nothing to wake up for. I miss nothing being complicated. I miss the sunshine. I miss the long nights. I miss freedom. I miss you.
Mostly you.

I kinda wanna go away again
I miss missin you.























I am so in love with you.

oh my god this hurts like hell

i know you care but :/

yeah.

Forgot i wanted to see you.
its fine

I hate being this angry or upset or just pissed off and sitting in my room, its how ba habits start, its how i get into 'that mood' Its how i punch walls.

Your kkind of like a drug to me,
if i dont see you everynight, until the moment i fall asleep i feel shit and empty inside
its so weird

I love you

And i love you too
I need to keep wringing my diary
as long as you dontread it again.
cant fucking wait untill i move out
eugh its gunna be so bangin man, i can do what i want, stay where i want and act how i want,
untill this day i am trapped
3 years.
three years.


Why dont you stand up be a man about it, fight with your bare hands about it.

sigh

it still actually cuts me up
either im crying or my eyes gione crazy

You were so good to me

but now im out here in the cold with jut my own hands to hold
where are you
where are you.

Never thought youd end up like this.
school is starting
fml.


I had the notion that youd make me change my ways
and the bad habits would be gone in a matter of days.

the way your eyes glow, sends chills down my spine

I fell head over, fell head over heels
and i cant get over, her smile the way it makes me feel.

nommm, this song ♥

Butterflies and sleepless nights

it makes so much more sence now, alot of things do, theyve all sort of clicked :)
happy flik


so tommorow im seeing my chinese box becca,
i love her.
and then were going out for food
and im dead excited for ribs.

Im going sams now,
bye

Its only real till it ends

Im so sorry were not good enough for you.

Dont worry, you'll forget. I promise.

But I know in time that people change
I was foolish to think we'd stay the same
But I don't wanna loose my best friend
Tell me if this is love or am I just to comfortable

Its your grace, and how it keeps me grounded.

I don't think i will ever intentionally change,

i mean, i h ave changed, and I'm totally aware of this, Ive grown up

changed my hair a bit

i talk differently

But the way in which i react to situations and the choices i make will probably never change,

I will always get angry,

and make the 'irresponsible' choice in your eyes,

But not being funny, I'm living and I'm happy,

and in my life i only have one regret.

So after 16 years I'm pretty proud of myself, I haven't fucked up my life, I did fucking good in my GSCE's seeing as i was barely in school and when i was in school i was either asleep or daydreaming.

I don't want to be boring, i watch people like you, i watch you wishing away your life, always waiting for something. But sometimes you cant always wait. You have to grab the reigns and pull on them tight until you take off. Sitting around waiting doesn't get you anywhere.

I don't believe you have to work for everything though, sometimes, quite often i have found, things will just fall into place, whether its slowly or in seconds. You just have to think, every things going to be alright.

So get plastered and fall over, coz in the end who gives a shit? If your laughing no one will care.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

So i will try a bit harder to be less of a cunt, in 6th form I'm going to keep out of drama, keep away from people who i don't like or who will bring me down and just be me.

I'm not changing though, I promise.

As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there with them, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might.

Kiss me, K-K-Kiss me, infect me with your love and fill me with your poison.

Take me T-T-Take me, wanna be a victim ready for redemption .

faaacking hell

DickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCuntDickCunt
I hope you realise how your acting.

I just suddenly got over whelmed with this weird feeling that i cant even describe,
so ima write it out with pictures,
maybe that will do it.-

You must not know bout me

And keep talking that mess, that's fine
But could you walk and talk at the same time?

I actually wonder sometimes why people are such dick heads,
like im not being funny,
just be a decent person
its not hard, im managing just fine
Fucking hell.

On a happier note-
I didnt realise how sweet you are,
or how much youd care
thank you, for everything.

And as for you.
I couldnt live without you
found what i was missing.

and I love it all.

fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fuckedfucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked.
this is basically everything right now.

Thats M-O-N-E-Y so sexy ii,

im so confused about what to do with my life,
i cant go to college this year and maybe i cant go next year, who know if ill get funding or not :/
and id rather gaudge my eyes out with a pen thgan go 6th form.
so i might take some beauty courses this year, get my make up artist course down maybe a hair course too, anything to fall back on if all else fails.
but i dont know where to go :/
FML.

Let you put your hands on me

In my skin tight jeans,
be your teenage dream tonight,

I feel grown up for once,
like, my lifes kinda sorted out right now,
I have everything i need, and currently there is minimal drama,
I like not having drama in my life, its so 'year 10' oh she said this he did this, like shut the fuck up.
I was talking to harry about our year and like everyone needed to just grown the fuck up, and some people still do, seriiously, im not trying to sound all mature and shit but were in 6th form now, get over it haha,
and some people are just so extra, i cant deal with them,

But my life is great
and im happy.

Quick post, im going out.

Im getting back into bloggind, its good.
Righhht so im getting my life on track a bit, booking the course monday, sending my forms off soon too.
Today i went to poojas, uits was good, saw some people.
Im going to becca now, then sams.
busy busy,

You loved me coz im fragile, i thought that i was strong

This time, maybe ill do it.
Im taking a pre-audition course at urdang, this should help me see what they want
I need to be what they want?

I had insecurities, you showed me i am beautiful

it was one of those nights you wished never ended.
Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight

Im standing here before you with my heart in my hands.

So I read this quote once right?
And it spoke about how the first time you fall in love you give everything, that person has the whole of you, your quirks, your habits, your dysfunctional personality and all the parts you love about yourself. It's all theirs, your completely naive enough to give away your whole heart and your whole self until you no longer own any of it. But when it ends -which lets be honest, it will, nothing lasts- you have nothing left of yourself. And you have to re build yourself as this new lone person, and you may sit thinking ' do i like potatoes?' because you don't remember if the person who was there, before you gave away everything, really did like potatoes, or the sound of rain on the pavements, or the smell of grass. So when you fall in love again you cannot give everything, because you've given it all away before, you know better this time; you cant give away everything you gave away before because a part of you, no matter how tiny that part may be, is still left with your first ever love.
This tiny part of you that believes it really can last forever, and that the person really is totally perfect for you and they can't ever hurt you. This one part remains with the person, refraining you from ever giving as much as you first gave.
Well i don't want to give everything for you not to give as much.
But i need to make the mistake to know not to do it again.
People keep saying to me, hold a part of yourself back, don't give away everything. To be completely honest with you I don't know how to, its all or nothing I'm afraid.
So watch out.

Good boy`

so im just sat here with fish
cornwall was lush
cba for long blog posts-
so heres my life ina nutshell
girls
boyfriend
cornwall
tan
danicing
allow.

I miss missing you

today i shopped,
i got:
treggins,
pale blue jeans ♥,
a denim playsuit,
Canvas military boots,
Shorts,
Two bikinis,
A skirt,
And im currently ordering
Another Juicy bag,
Two OPI nail clopurs, alice in wonderland ofc,
two cropped tees, one lace, one with whiskers and a cat face :)
Cheeky fridnship bracelets
and a broch :)
oooo

today has been good,




Sort it out,

Sweetheart, one day youll stop lying, and youll have nothing left.

Don't lie to me, because I know you are and it makes you look like a cunt.

Allow prom, I don't like my dress, I don't have Shoes, And my face won't match my body
fuckk everything ATM
universe I hate you.

She liked his tears so much that she put out her beautiful finger and let them run over it.

Ive always been slightly in love with peter pan,
it makes me feel so strange
how peter was so completly besotted and in love with wendy that he couldnt even see it.
and how he really did grow up, but he told himself he hadnt so that h could continue playing and pretending and laughing.
and you knew hed grown up when it said:

“There could not have been a lovelier sight; but there was none to see it except a little boy who was staring in at the window. He had ecstasies innumerable that other children can never know; but he was looking through the window at the one joy from which he must be for ever barred.”

Peter loved Wendy even if he pretended he didnt :(
it makes me feel so sick though, i dont quiet understand it myself.
I think its because in reality i want someone to fall for me how Peter did for Wendy, and i want to find something magical like that.

And you know wendy never, ever would have forgotten Peter,
"Next year he did not come for her. She waited in a new frock because the old one simply would not meet, but he never came.
"Perhaps he is ill," Michael said.
"You know he is never ill."
Michael came close to her and whispered, with a shiver, "Perhaps there is no such person, Wendy!" and then Wendy would have cried if Michael had not been crying."

Its just a story Flik.

I feel empty and alone and sick
I don't know what to do
all I can do is lay here and listen to Bruno mars
I actually feel awful right now
major low, hitting back down.
You did it to her, why should I think I'm any different at all.
Fuck. My. Life.

So bored i could eat myself.
its painful.

I dont know what to think about this situating,
my friends are telling me things
and im thinking things
and its all turning into this spinning jumble of shit.
so im going to go with my instinct and do whatever i want too
because as my good friend told me ' no matter how much some cares about you, your the person with your best interests in mind'
And i do have my best interests in mind
my happiness

I haven't felt like this in a long while
butterflies and sleepless nights?
well said,
i finally understand it now.
and its fucking great.

Im totally stoked for this summer, its going to be amazing.
just the sun and us, and eugh its going to be so wonderful.

So we went to the woods, for a walk. and i said all i need to say, and we all spoke and laughed and shouted. And we realised how amazing the woods really are, no one can hear what your saying, no one cares.
Think of all the secrets that it must hold, the foundations of the trees, hundreds of years old, seeing tears and laughs and arguments and maybe more...
but the woods are a good thing, we did have an amazing time.

Living for numero uno.

Oh god, I haven't felt like this in a long time

it's amazing
but oh shit.

Love made me blind

Please don't fuck me over,
this could be a good thing

dear universe, so I know we haven't got along well so far but I think your doing a good job of turning it around, let's keep this good thing going yes? Coz cmon you've fuckedd me over enough.

I've got my Cheney back
I found it.
I love my friends.
Lifes bless

Can we pretend that airplanes, In the night sky, Are like shooting stars,

I could really use a wish right now,
i have no energy or sympathy left for people who bring the shit on themselves,
look yeh if someones treating you like shit, messing you up, being a cunt
drop them
stop complaining and get on with it okay
becuase i have so much other shit going on than you dumping your endless life problems on me, im not as strong as you think i am okay, eventually im gunna crack.
so stop fucking complaining if its your fault your in shit.
deal with it.
im
sorry.

you get me out of my unchangeable mood

Drake,

sorry my replies so late and sorry about the whole adress issue,
thank you or taking the time to write yourblog :)
its nice to know whats going on with you lik
eover in utahhhh
:)
englands a pure pile of shit but like maybe its getting a bit better?
we'll wait and see eh?
sorry about the whole Dixon thing thatt reallly sucks major arse
anyways ill reply better at a slighhhtly later point but for nowww this is me saying titsss beeen read :)
loveee
xx

hands over my head thinking what else could go wrong .
would of stayed in bed, how can the day be so long

never believed that things happen for a reason.
but how this turned out removed all my doubts so believeeee
that for you I'd do it all over again.
( do it all over again )
all I went through led me to you
so I'd do it all over again ... for you. for you . for you

I missed the first train stood out in the rain all daaaay.
little did I know, when I caught the next train there you were to sweep me way. guess that's what I waited for

never believed that things happen for a reason
but how this turned out removed all my doubts.
so believe that for you I'd do it all over again ( do it all over again)
all I went through it led me to you .
so I'd do it all over again.

O0o who ever thought a day gone so wrong would turn out so lovely.
yea I'm so glad I found you
even though the day went so wrong I wouldn't change a thing.
yeaaa yea o0o I'd do it yea yea yea
I'd do it all over again
do it all over, again again again
all I went through it led me to you .
so I'd do it all over again.
( I'd do it all over again )
I'd do it all over
( I'd do it all over again )
I'd do it all over
( I'd do it all over again )
I'd do it all over
( I'd do it all over again )
for you . for you .
all I went through it led me to you ( to you )
I'd do it all over ( I'd do it all over again )
whoever thought a day gone so wrong could turn out so lovely 2x
o0o yeaa yeaa

This is my favourite song.

dont make me feel guilty for my actions.

This is where I start to miss you more than I can bare I hate this distance in between us, I don't think it's fair.

Listen yeah,
i had to tell okay, i couldnt keep this all to myself
its too much for one person to hold
i have your existence on my shoulders its hard okay
im sorry that i lied to you
im sorry that i told
im sorry i cant save you.

Cheney
im so glad your coming home to us
i love you.

Just shut the fuck up.

just a moment to change all we are.

wow :)
so im feeling so numb right now
but ahh weelll

It's your finger and how I'm wrapped around it.
It's your grace and how it keeps me grounded.
I love our phone conversations :)

I don't really mind it, yo know when you run out of words
so you just sit there
I like people who can just be silent
and who don't try and fill the gaps
I like the silence

Im feeling rather worried about the next two years if my life
I think there going to be pure shit
strike that.

I know they will be.

I close my eyes oh god I think I'm falling
out of the sky
I close my eyes.
I'll take you there.

I'll stop your hurting I promise

I'm so I'll it's so bad
I want the summer so bad it hurts
like oh my
we'll get to see your face everyday
and I'll go on holiday
and do project
and see the girls
and get tanned
and eat food
and it's gunna be the best fucking summer ever
goddamitt

allow you

get busy living or get busy dying

it looks liek i have a plastic nipple stuck to my face becuase of my clear lip bar
sexy flik,, reall sexyy
me and my heart got crazy issues (8)



sexy motherfucker.

Thank you :)

so m aybe that last post was a taad dramatic
i mean i have alot of amazing things in my life :)
like my freiendss
and kings college ;)
and certain people
and sunny days
and bacon
and tube socks
and this list could continue

sometimes things do get really shitty
and i have to run to fishes house
but like you know your gunna wake up tommorow and everything will be fine again
because its nearly summer
and theres monster to drink and bacon to eat

so i really do love my life
just gets shit sometimes dunn it


The butterflys gone

i will com e back.

I hate my life.

Oh i wish that i ,was looking into your eyes.

What a silly young girl i have been,
allow you and your childish antics, becuase weve seen better
laughed harder
smiled more

and ive been so happy the last few days
nothing compares to that feeling,
when time slows down, and its three in the morning and were all smiling and laughing and talking
becuase were happy :)

allow the haters
allow the shits
allow the issues :)

I love my friends

I love becca sutherland, shes done more for me than she knows

I love the parties

I love the holidays

I love the tan

I want summer.

Bring me someone beautiful? we'll do an exchange.

So it happened, i finally got a place at Italia Conti,
its the one year course at Guilford, but i made the 12 year old girl inside me fucking proud

I did it, i fucking showed them all, i did it i got in.

But i don't know if i can go.

Have you ever had something in your reach
like a butterfly, it lands on your hand, its beautiful and unique and strange, but your so scared of it too because it looks kind of weird with its antennas and funny eyes, but you don't want to move. so you stay very, very still, and for that moment, you had the butterfly on your hand, it was beautiful and you feel beautiful, but then something moves, and it flies away and it leaves you feeling a bit empty inside.

That's how i feel.
For now its like the butterfly is here, and everything is pure bliss, but if i cant get funded 15k something will scare the butterfly away.
And ill have to stay here.

Comparisons are easily done
once you've had a taste of perfection.

I got my lip pierced,
I spent the last 24 hours at Andys
And im so fucking scared right now.

i fucking love you.
you dont even know
this is tearing me up



im not ready for tuesday
im not going to get in
and all this bull shit is getting to my head
im sorry that ive kept up old habits
and that i kept it secret

we had such big dreams
we really did

isnt that what you said, what you thought the song meant.

I am easily effected by others moods, songs and books.
I need to start reading again because my vocabulary is jsut shit.

I know i dont understand, and im not ttrying too
im jsut waiting for eerything to get good for me.
if it doesnt happen soon i give up on karma
its a cunt..

And i keep doing stupid things
i know i shouldnt

i need to stop looking up symtoms.

everytime we touch i feel the static...

im legal
to buy a lawnmower :)

im old in 41 minuets :(
but im bare tired so i think im gunna sleeep :)HAPOEASDFJ;

I loved you first

Tommrow I'm 16
I don't know what I feel right now

I loved you first

Tommrow I'm 16
I don't know what I feel right now

Count my hits and not my misses...

Tbh I don't want you to know that I'm not good enough, that's wh I don't tell you
I want your approval for all of this
so for the next two weeks it's nothing but dance and coursework for me,
no lunches
just dancing
I want this
and I'm going to do everything in my power to get it
fuck yeahhh

I would like to thank kayleigh and her house
becuase she is always there when I need a place to go
I love you x

she lives in a fairytale

I think i do,

secrets shred you up right, they spin around you until there all you can see
This cant be sorted this time
Im sorry that your worried, mum.
Im sorry im like this at the moment,
im not sure how ong it will last?
maybe it will be like

no
I havent got the energy for argments
i dont have the time for my work
i think im going a bit fucking crazy

Bury the castle.

I might quit teen queen
what's the fuckibg point

I'm stuck In this routine
at least this time you listened
but you offer was reediculous, go it to work?
Who would hire me
so i don't know whatto do
I'm sorry if I'm not happy
I can't help it
I'll lie next time,

I want to move away...

I have nothing to say
I feel small
inadiquate

I can't fucking believe this.
You know what I'm like, you know me
everyone knows.
I can't fucking blahhhdjdskznsjbankdndidnd
fuck it
fuck this.

Owh
I want something of my own.

Next thing were touching...

Seeing the crazies tonight
can't wait for alive in wonderland
Text Felicity Abbott to 84205 :)
I love my head phones

I'm only as vain as I allow...

I think it's time for change (:
Im not geting as drunk as saturday for a long time,
Until i've sorted my head, bad things leave my mouth
Good thing your a nice lad eh

I'm lucky me, I have a happy life tbh :)
Sometimes things just go a bit wrong,
I have alot to thank my friends for
They are my strength, complety
And I love them with every part of me

I can't wait for the summer, it's going to be amazing, then come September things are going to be so different, ill be here and in bath and meeting new people and I acctually cannot wait.

Jeremy Kyle show, haa there a bunch of pussys :)

Later chicks :)

Come here rude boy boy can you get it up?

Come here rude boy boy is it big enough?

No one likes a but munch
I love friends
It's amazing

Sooo I'm okay

All of the stars, are fading away...

try not to worry youll see them someday

You cant trust anyone
My girls are the only people that ill stand by me
throughout anything

Get over your high school dramas
i dont give a shit
This is what happeneds when i let my guard down, and i let people in
things get fucked
im never doing it again.
From now on im not going to be like this
I try to live differently, more carefree
but nothing works out how you want it to

Fuck the world.

im a tit.

My fragile strength was gone...

This is actually proper fucking me off,
like yeh i didnt get into college, but what if i dont get into the intensive course, what if i NEVER get in :|
what would i do,
what was i put here to do
Becuasee you make me question myself.

Life is lethargic at the moment,
nothings going on.

And people are sooo up them selves, swweetie, im not jealous, i really dont give a shit who you like okayyyy

And how can people not hate, i dont understand
if someones a cunt to you, youd hate them right,
maybe i just dont forgive,

My blogs have got boring

Wordgeeman.

Your not a nob

Your a beautiful and amazing person :)

I love you cheney (:
Its all coming true for you honey :)
you'll be famous soon dont you worry xx

Be your best friend yeah ill love you forever, up in the club yeah were higher than ever.

So he shoot went crazy good yestarday (:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Felicity-Abbott-Teen-Queen/309070477077?ref=ts
Join it

I like photoshooots

SUCKK OWTTTT DICKKK

So i didnt get into collegee,
mm

But then i went for a walk with the girls, cleared my head and sorted owt my life,
Suck owt internet, i wont be using you much anymore.

guys that fight are hot

the above statement is true, im sorry :)

omg college audition on monday, im SHITING IT!

I'm addicted it's a crisis

'you have every right'
Cheney, thank you for telling me this,
Sometimes I think I'm crazy
And jeolous, but you telling me that made me see I'm right
I love you x

I set you free, I helped you fly

Drake, I read it,
I miss you too

Message me x

Honk went CRAZYYY good :D
awwh last perfromance at QM :(
i lvoe everyone
We all need to start living before its too late, fear is stupid. So are regrets...

oooh

i want the next party,
got a good plan
so maths next. If shes not in im bare happy

i think you forgot the dream,
your detached,
i love you

Im bored of moany people

just fucking get over stuff and have a good time okay.

Like its better cramped, yeh who gives a shit if its muddy
Just shut the fuck up.

gett over shittt man and just have a good time,
youll be happyy

twattttttt

They say when you love somone you should set them free

And if they love you too
They'll come back

I just understood this phrase,
So I'm going to set people free :)

Mmmmm yeh
So honk next week beautiful
And yeh :)
Love you all

Setting you free or whateer

They say, you don't know what you've got untill it's gone,
So I need you to leave
So I'll see what I'll be missing
But i'm scared coz I know what I've got
So maybe you should stay,
I know what I'll be missing

They say, you don't know who you are until you change
And you've changed me more,
Than anybody else has
But maybe you should stay
Change me more
And I can change you too
I'll do it like you do

Butterflies, like statues
Frantic inside, just like you
And I can't hide, from your sun
Coz your my light, ive found you.

So noone told you life was gunna be this way...

I love sick days
There so good
Omgosh teen queen I'm so excited I have my four outfits planned
Okay, for the first shoot
Washed out acid jeans, White abercrombie polo
Second outfit
Starbucks tee, denim shirt, chain belt, wooley tights, White leg warmera and grey boots.
Third,
Abercrombie dress, blue heels
Fouth
Black tutu skirt, grey evenecence tee, leather jacket and red heels
So it's all sorted
Ooooh :)

Everything is sorted
And happy

Minus one boy
But oh well :)

Love you all
I miss my brother

YOU KL B

Oh christ,
I DONT SPEAK YOUR LANGUAGE DARLING,

Abdi

kl b

22:13Felicity

soo i know youuuu

22:14Abdi

random add b init hope you kl with that init

22:15Felicity

ha yeh

22:16Abdi

klkl what endz you from b

22:17Felicity

hillingdon you

22:18Abdi

harrow b

22:19Abdi

you got a man b ?

22:19Felicity

nope

22:20Abdi

still

what year you in ?

22:20Felicity

11

22:20Abdi

klkl

22:21Abdi

what you linking up b ?

22:22Felicity

what?

22:22Abdi

you on linking up ?

22:22Felicity

erm no?

22:22Abdi

whos that b

22:23Felicity

what?

22:23Abdi

i mean whys that init ?

22:23Felicity

oh, cozzz im not?

22:23Abdi

klkl,

soo what you on then ?

22:24Felicity

likeee?

22:25Abdi

what i mean is get to know me init

22:25Felicity

ermm no love

22:25Abdi

LOOL

22:25Felicity

sorry imm

22:25Abdi

~?

22:25Felicity

not rweally looknig for anythng atm

not rweally looknig for anythng atm

22:26Abdi

NOT EVEN A LITTLE LINK UP

22:26Felicity

no

22:26Abdi

KL

22:26Felicity

You don't have permission to chat with this person.

yehhhhhh

Oh sweetie :)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

RIGHT NOW I AM BAREEEEEEEEEEEE HAPPPPS

TEEN QUEEEN FOW SHOWWW!!!

Thats fine darling,
you just text any little slag you want about me,
since, if you dont care, i dont right?

Fucking wrong heyy,
you get to me, so much
i want to punch every single one of those girls in the face,
i hate how you can do this to me, because no one else can
but dont you worry just carry on.
Dont come to me, since we never talk anymore. the addictions gone, so is the old you
so dont tell me you still care deep down coz fuck it, we both know you don't give two fucks about me do you.
and if you do
you dont show it
If you want to make me fee like shit, carry on. Because your soo dayum good at it boy.


FUCKKK THISSS.

Becuase, your love, your love, your love. Is my drug...

I think your an idiot, straight up.

I love you kayleigh (L)
today was goood yehh

Lier, lier if were keeping score...

People should stop lieing :).
It's ugly
Sooo this weekend was good
The weekend after next is gun be crunk yeh yehhhh
I haven't learnt my lines and the show is two weeks away
Ooooops :)
I ordered pretty dresses and can't wait for them to come :)
And I'm applying for a job soon


I'm happy ATM
I like it :)
I love my friends :) even thought we have days where were all moody and we clash I know we can justbe like, your really pissing me off
And we can move on :)
I have beautiful friendships (L)
Xfactor rahhh!
And you slept with her, stop lieing :)
Love you x

CHENEY TOEEEE!

awh tonight was soo good, had a proper laugh with the girls
4th finger so SUCK OWTTTT!
:) i love khaki (L) bnahaaa cadet uniform? beautifull (L)
Im so happy :)
I love my friends, there beautiful-littrally

So the exam went well :)
I've been watching too much torchwood recently haha
Parets evening tonight
Kill me now
It's gunna go shit haha
Tommrow night is gunna be awesome, pizza my girls ice cream?

Hmmm :)

I have nothing of interest to write
Love x

So today
we went to see the stunning Justin Bieber, but we didnt,
we ran
and we didnt see him

Gotta get famous!

Im so scared to audition for college, i find out there and then, on that day and eugh im worried!
Love x

You make me feel out of my element...

My exam went good :)
i fucked up the vocab but hey, i was low and i travelled alot
i smiled and she liked me
my improv was pure jest, i was all Joe darby WRIST WRIST movement, thank jesus he tought us some goooood lyical dances
and i split rrolled on the floor (L)

But then just before the bow, she wa slooking down and writing, and i though i was gunna pass out
like full on, sick everywhere
luckily i wasnt
but i came out and appaz i was PURE white,
even caked in makeup :)

so yeh
went good
contris forms
BASCIALLY DONE

oooooh
if you werent such a rape shit it would all be fine :)

meeting my husband tommorow
LOVE YOU ALL
xxx

you don't want to be here in the future, so you say the presents just a pleasant inturruption to the past

I hate this feeling
I hate sleeping after an argument
I hate how much I care because it's not right
I need to stop

Everythings wrong.

I hope you choke, on every word that kissed that bottle...

Modern exam tommrow, I'm kinda worried but feeling a bit confident
Just gunna go and jam out,
Do what people tell me and have fun :)
Oh god some people talk forever...
Teen queen forms sent
Urdang forms sent
Contis forms...

Your so ugly when you cry...

i love glee :)
such a good show

don't tell me your sorry coz your not,
baby coz i know your only sorry you got caught.

You wanna start telling people the truth, coz i look like a mug.

I caught myself with...

So the maths exam was crazy easy,
I finished in 20 minuets and sat there for 40
Get in :)

I'm feeling better though, so it's cool

I need my memory stick back.

Set me free, leave me be...

Maths exam tommroow

Let her out so she can breathe 'aaaawoooooh'

wow I can finally blog from my beloved iPod so here we gooo
Tonght was so much fun, will farrel or however it's spelt is actually hilarious :)
School was suprisingly okay due to the fact were pretty hated hah
My beds super comfy :)
Me and Kayleigh got out of class again today, oh the joys of being loved by tachers
We get permission to bunk :)

Exams next week, crazzzzyyyy shit heyy
And urdang forms sent,
Just gotta send the contis one now

TEENQUEEN
Miss duffy made me apply, so I did :) I hope I get through :)

Sleep time babys I don't have dancing tommrow :)

Bless to the sky and back x

Im a stuck up plastic CUNT,

you fucking peice of shit,
like to see you try it yeah?
start on a girl infront of everyone
that'd make you a HARDDDMAN
nahh your dirt to me.
Your dead in my books.

FUCK IT

Its time to be greedy...

Today i had another panic attack,
it was pretty bad,
everything went funny and black
and i thought i was going to collapse,
buut to the rescue came Kiris inhaler,
which i took 4 times,
it sorted out my breathing though.

My college forms are done
I am scared to audition
I have science and maths exams this month,
textiles due in febuary,
im behind in RES MAT, but when arent i?
two music units and
a solo peice to coreograph,
i aslo have a m odern exam

IM 15, WHAT IS THIS!

My poor chickens are outside, and its snowing,
i hope they dont freeze to death.

Hmmmmm
cannot wait till this month is over.


preying my school isnt open tommororw,

Oh i just HAVE to get into urdang, its so pretty its rediculous,
gotta do it :)


GUNNA WORK HARD.

peace out, bless forever.

Ima fight till we see the sunlight...

So, fucking scared right now.

in under six hours i will be waking up for school...

and yet here i am
my mind at ease from teenage troubles,

im scared, im going to fail at school, im not smart like my friends, there all going to do so amazingly because there smart and focussed, guys im so proud of you for that, your going to go far :)
and im the stupid one, the one whose heads in the wrong place,
if i don't make it as a dances i got no fall back.
Nothing.
God, im asking for this so work,
only that

i feel sick.
Take me away.

Fate is an elegant, cold hearted WHORE...

so today we saw possibly the most beautiful boy in the world,
and we saw them once, they checked us out and we left,
then we got to tghe station and they were there,
we got on the wrong train,
they were on the one we were supposed to get on,
we got off, waited,
they came, we didnt get on.

Fates a bitch.

he was lovely (L)

im gunna make a change

this year, im going to be different, in going to have a good time, be happy,
and im not going to care,
if i have an issue with someone, in going to do something about it.
Im gunma be happy.
Lets do this shit.